Six months ago I signed up for an art class. 1) I started a painting, one I’ve been trying to finish ever since. The experience, challenging & very humbling.

Having spent a near lifetime chasing academic & professional success, Art is different. It’s subjective, personal, creative. Making Art forced me to confront some of my deepest fears. Fear of not being good enough. Fear of not being loved.

Where there were fears, I see now, there were also coping mechanisms.. I was judgmental, insensitive, controlling. Of myself, and worse yet, of others. I hurt people, ones I love and care deeply about, more than I could imagine.

A heartfelt apology to all affected. I can’t change the past. But I can acknowledge, learn, and grow for the future. I am resolved on that. This piece, my waypoint on that path.

Beauty is everywhere. Love is unconditional. The future, brighter.

The painting is titled “Hawaiian Mermaid.” Enjoy!

Update: I initially attempted to tell the story of how I arrived at these self-realizations. Not relevant. My realizations, apology, and resolve stand alone.

 
Ω

Footnotes


  1. The Art Awakening class at Muaisa Hale Pule. If you feel drawn to make space in your life for Spirit, I can’t recommend the Muaisa programing enough.

21 thoughts on “Making Art

  1. What a sensitive and heartfelt expose, Kimon! I am humbled by your vulnerability and honesty of heart.<3 <3 Thank you too for plugging Muaisa Hale Pule - Shamanic Lodging & Awakenings in Hawaii where you definitely feel like family. So good also to see the finished "Hawaiian Mermaid." Keep up the good work!

  2. Aloha Kimon!

    Fabulous writing, truth and honesty, and your awakening of continuous “life” exploration and journeying. “WOW!”

    This is what “life” is all about. Enjoy it in its co-creation and unfolding. “Enjoying ones Life is the Highest form of Worship.”

    Wonderful feelings expressed in your art ventures Kimon!

    Continued Awakenings and Blessings Be!

  3. Aloha Kimon!

    Fabulous writing, truth and honesty, and your awakening of continuous “life” exploration and journeying. “WOW!”

    This is what “life” is all about. Enjoy it in its co-creation and unfolding. “Enjoying ones Life is the Highest form of Worship.”

    Wonderful feelings expressed in your art ventures Kimon!

    Continued Awakenings and Blessings Be!

    1. I have always enjoyed Clint Eastwood’s definition of success, which has over the years withstood the test of time: “to be good at something, to enjoy doing it, and to feel a sense of pride or accomplishment upon its completion.” 🙂 🙂

    2. Yep, the basic “follow your bliss” approach as long a it continues to bring you bliss; notice when it doesn’t, or when that stops or changes, and negotiate the difference! 🙂 🙂 Simple, not always easy, but it becomes more natural with intention, awareness and practice!

  4. Fascinated by your story. thank you for sharing, I think we can all internalize a lot of what you’re saying in our unique experiences. If you ever wander back into CT again I’d love to meet you again as adult. Best of luck

    1. I I suspect we’ve in fact all struggled with forging our own path. It’s a journey, a never ending process. Reunions are a great way to recognize how far we’ve come, and a CT one would be very fun. Blessings in return

  5. It’s stunning to uncover self knowledge. Like a plot twist in a detective novel. But at least with me situations change and I’m back in the dark with another lesson yet to learn.

    1. Yess.. not even clear if you’re the “good gal” or “bad guy”. Likely neither – duality, another mental obstacle to overcome. Self-knowledge does seem like our best hope in the fight against ignorance.. perhaps in the end, just be open to change, and embrace the process.

Leave a Reply